On Being and Becoming

The transition from one year into the next can spark the urge to set intentions and goals, and to feel into an opportunity for a fresh start. Whether that's your jam or not, I am in full support.

I like to take this time to reflect, recognize, and rejoice. To take stock of what already exists and to celebrate what is readily available. It's too easy for me to notice what's not going well, what could be better, and what isn't happening or working. These times seem to be making that even easier than normal. I am aware of how much time, space, and energy those thoughts and feelings take up. There is extensive evidence to show an imbalance in the way we humans use negative versus positive experiences. Many studies have shown that we humans gravitate and tend to negative experiences over positive ones. This has a lot to do with our survival instincts and how we are programmed. You can read all about it by searchingthe negativity bias. This is a huge and important topic in regards to understanding ourselves and others better and we cover it in great detail during our online program, The Process.

It doesn't work to deny or reject negative, agitating, and activating realities. They are valid, have a purpose, and are a huge part of what keeps us growing and doing. Challenging thoughts, feelings, experiences need to be seen-heard-felt-processed. I spend a lot of time supporting people through just that and I have brilliant people that do the same for me on a regular basis. And along with ensuring that I am doing that work, I notice that it takes a conscious effort (and sometimes support) to shift from the parts of me that are often wrapped up in what isn't, to the parts of me that are able to recognize and rejoice in what is.

There are many benefits that come with connecting to what is (and has already been) going well. Doing so can promote embodied experiences of stability, strength, confidence, security, safety, and empowerment. These experiences are exactly what we need in order to feel the capacity to face all of the other sh*#t.

So, I am writing to share some easy and practical ways to consciously balance out the work ofbecoming morewith the practise ofbeing with what is. I hope this helps to invite and welcome more joy into your day.

Try these three processes and feel free to share your findings and experience in the blog comments below.

Recognizing your gifts:
-Reflect on and/or write about the good qualities that you know you can rely on and already have. It could be helpful to imaging what someone who loves you would think, say, or write.

Recognizing gifts in others:
-Reflect on and/or write a list of the people in your life that you feel are close to your heart. What are three qualities that they embody, that you appreciate and can rely on?

Recognizing the gifts of life:
-Reflect on and/or write a list of 10 things that already exist in your life that you can rely on, that bring you a sense of bone or more of the following: stability, security, safety, joy, happiness, peace, ease.

Try saying the things you reflected on and/or wrote out loud. You might even share them with someone else. Notice the felt-sense of these realities and give your body some time to rejoice in them.

Girl writing in journal
The ProcessLisa MessinaThe ProcessComment