Homeostasis for the Holidays: Return to Regulation
We’ve all heard the phrase home for the holidays, but no matter where you find yourself this season, there’s another kind of homecoming waiting for you—the return to your inner home.
The holidays bring a mix of joys and stressors—from family gatherings and travel to seasonal demands, and it’s easy to feel pulled away from your sense of groundedness. Amidst the busyness, we often lose touch with our internal sense of “home,” the place where balance, connection, and resilience reside.
This is where homeostasis comes in. Homeostasis is the body’s natural state of internal balance—where our systems work together harmoniously to maintain stability when faced with external changes. This delicate balance is the foundation for feeling present, resilient, and connected.
That’s why we’re offering Homeostasis for the Holidays, your Holiday SOS—a gift of nine of my favourite, simple, and accessible practices designed to help you return to a state of inner stability. These tools act as small anchors, offering moments of safety and presence when life feels overwhelming. I’ve found these practices to be incredibly helpful for myself and the people I work with, and I’m thrilled to share them with you!
While these practices can make a meaningful difference on their own, they are just one part of a larger picture. Sustainable regulation—the ability to stay present, open, and resilient in the face of life’s challenges—requires a holistic approach. Regulation isn’t about chasing the perfect calm. It’s about building the capacity to navigate the highs and lows of life—not just during the holidays but all year round. This deeper work is at the heart of what we do at The Messina Movement through private sessions and group programs like The Process.
This blog will guide you through:
The different states of the nervous system through the lens of polyvagal theory
What nervous system regulation means and why it matters
How small, consistent practices can foster resilience and capacity
The value of depth work to complement these small, consistent practices
Through December, let this blog be your go-to resource as you explore what helps you feel most centered and connected. Everyone’s experience of regulation is unique, and what works best for you may change day to day. These practices offer a starting point—a chance to come back to yourself, one practice, one moment at a time.
Together, let’s take the first step toward finding home within.
Understanding the Nervous System
The Autonomic Nervous System (ANS) is responsible for involuntary and vital functions like heart rate, breathing, digestion, etc., and responses within the body. It regulates and coordinates our actions and reactions to internal and external input—it’s at the core of all we do in our daily lives.
Nervous system regulation is when the various branches of the ANS are operating harmoniously. Regulating the ANS is as complex and delicate as the functions it’s responsible for, and takes much more than a quick fix to “achieve” regulation. A regulated nervous system is able to adapt to life’s demands and various levels of activation while maintaining overall balance and harmony. Dysregulation is the opposite, when these natural processes and optimal functions become disrupted.
When we talk about regulation, we are referring to the process of restoring overall balance and harmony within the system. We do this by connecting to a felt-sense of safety while navigating life’s challenges.
To better understand the nervous system states and responses, we turn to the polyvagal theory developed by Dr. Stephen Porges. The ANS has two primary branches, sympathetic and parasympathetic (which is further broken down into two pathways), all of which shape our responses to safety, stress, and connection:
1. Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS): Fight or Flight
The SNS is activated when we perceive a threat or danger, preparing our body for action—whether to fight or flee. During stressful moments, like work pressure or travel, the SNS may trigger a stress response, heightening our arousal, anxiety, or sense of panic. While essential for survival, chronic activation leads to hypervigilance and constantly feeling on edge. Holiday example: Feeling overwhelmed or anxious amidst the chaos of holiday shopping or trying to meet familial expectations.
Read more about the fight or flight response in our blog post here.
2. Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS):
a) Ventral Vagal Pathway: Safe and Social
The ventral vagal pathway is our “rest and digest” mode, and a part of our parasympathetic nervous system. It promotes a sense of safety, calm, and connection, allowing us to engage fully in social interactions with balance and curiosity– things we crave especially during the holiday season. This is the state we aim to nurture through regulation practices, particularly in moments of stress, so we can remain present, open, and capable when life gets hectic. Holiday example: Enjoying a conversation, laughter, or a moment of connection with loved ones.
b) Dorsal Vagal Pathway: Shutdown
When stress becomes overwhelming and we feel like there’s no option to fight or flee, the dorsal vagal pathway (another part of our parasympathetic nervous system) engages, leading to a state of shutdown. This is a protective response that can cause numbness, dissociation, or withdrawal. It’s vital for survival in certain circumstances, but prolonged activation can result in feeling disconnected or emotionally frozen. Holiday example: Feeling emotionally “numb” or withdrawn during an intense family argument or retreating inward when overwhelmed by the demands of the season.
Read more about the shutdown response in our blog post here.
Blended Responses
The ANS states aren’t rigid; they’re fluid and often blend together. For example, the freeze response is a combination of sympathetic and dorsal vagal activation. Here, the body may feel the energy to act (sympathetic) but is immobilized by the overwhelming nature of the situation (dorsal vagal). This response can feel like pressing the gas pedal and the brake simultaneously, resulting in a sense of paralysis.
Another example of a blended response is when the ventral + sympathetic branches are both activated, where we feel socially connected and safe while actively engaged. Holiday example: During a holiday gathering, this could look like playing or dancing with family, feeling energized and safe at the same time. Picture individuals engaged and active while feeling safe and socially connected to one another.
When we are chronically outside of the ventral vagal state—stuck in the sympathetic or dorsal vagal states—we are surviving not thriving. In other words, our ANS is dysregulated and we’re often reacting rather than responding to stress with confidence and capacity.
Understanding these states can help us recognize where we are operating from. If we notice that we are in a perpetual stress response state, we can experiment with practices that help to restore overall balance, allow for more ventral vagal activation—our “home” state. When we nurture this state, we can more easily return to a grounded, balanced, and connected state, when our survival states are activated. A little ventral vagal activation goes a long way when it comes to restoring regulation.
The Process of Returning to Regulation
Regulation isn’t about achieving a state of perpetual calm–it’s unnatural and even unsafe to set your sights on that goal. We need all the states of our nervous system functioning effectively and flexibly to navigate life’s demands and encounters. Our nervous systems have evolved brilliantly to keep us safe, and the states we move through exist for very important reasons.
Instead of aiming for tranquility all the time, regulation is about building the capacity to acknowledge, allow, and express our feelings in safe ways. This process nurtures our nervous system’s ability to return to balance when life pulls us in different directions.
Regulation is a deep, ongoing practice that doesn’t happen immediately. Through gentle, consistent practices, we activate the ventral vagal pathway, which helps to create a sense of safety. This way we can stay present, open, and connected to whatever arises.
The first step toward regulation is awareness–noticing where we are at any given moment. We do this by turning attention onto ourselves with curiosity, compassion, and care. We begin to notice how we feel physically, mentally, and emotionally, which can help in identifying the nervous system state(s) we are operating from and how/if we are shifting between them throughout the day. Are we feeling the heightened energy of the sympathetic "fight or flight" state? The disengagement of the dorsal vagal "shutdown" state? Or the grounded, open space of the ventral vagal "safe and social" state? Once we identify where we are, we can use this information to guide ourselves back toward balance, or at least incorporate a felt sense of safety into whatever we’re experiencing.
Here’s a practical example:
Julie noticed a familiar surge of anger during a family gathering—a response she typically would’ve suppressed. Recognizing this reaction as part of her sympathetic activation (regardless of the trigger), she chose to safely nurture her nervous system by stepping outside, taking a few deep breaths, and moving her body in a way that felt good and allowed her to express and discharge some of that activated energy. By allowing the anger to exist, rather than suppressing it, she was able to honor the impulse while attuning to her needs in the moment. This created space for her to connect with a sense of calm before re-entering the gathering.
Though Julie may not have felt “good” immediately, she tapped into her internal resources and ability to self-regulate through practices like deep breathing and movement. Sometimes, nervous system regulation is simply about allowing ourselves to experience what’s there—without needing to “fix” it—and creating a safe space for it to be expressed.
That’s what Homeostasis for the Holidays is all about. It’s about finding accessible, gentle practices that help you build awareness and capacity—allowing you to acknowledge and express what’s there, rather than pushing it away. Our practices—like simple breathing techniques, accessible movements, grounding exercises, orienting practices, and more—serve as small anchors, guiding you back to restoring regulation—your Holiday SOS!
While each practice may not feel transformative right away, approaching them with curiosity and consistency can have a profound impact over time. By regularly engaging in these practices, you can make the return to regulation. That’s why we call it a process—one that deepens and strengthens with each step.
Depth Work & Somatic Processing for Healing
While our gentle regulation practices are powerful, they’re often only a piece of the puzzle. For many, long-term healing involves a combination of simple regulation practices—like those we’re offering in December—and deeper work. Depth work includes modalities that address the root causes of dysregulation, such as trauma, attachment patterns, and emotional triggers. This is the kind of work we offer in our private sessions and in The Process.
It’s common for people to only rely on practices that temporarily soothe symptoms of dysregulation without engaging with the deeper layers of healing, what we call nervous system bypassing. This is where we can get stuck, especially as nervous system regulation becomes more mainstream and DIY practices are widely accessible. If there’s one thing we want you to take from our Homeostasis for the Holidays series, it’s that soothing symptoms is a great start—but it’s just the beginning.
Somatic processing and attachment work with trauma-informed and trained practitioners are often essential to the healing process. This is the work we’re most passionate about offering! These modalities allow us to connect more fully with stored emotions, work through protective mechanisms, and create meaningful, lasting change.
Note, the practices within Homeostasis for the Holidays provide an entry point—a key to somatic healing—but on their own, they may not be enough to sustain regulation and build lasting resilience.
Your Holiday SOS is Here!
Let’s dive in! Now that you have a basic understanding of the ANS, regulation, and the depth work involved in somatic healing, it’s time for the practices—our gift to you.
Throughout December, look out for nine of our favourite practices via Instagram on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Each tool we share is designed to restore and maintain homeostasis–a state of balance and inner stability, among all the body systems. Over time, these gentle practices can help foster a felt sense of safety, even when external circumstances feel overwhelming.
The Guidelines
Before you begin any practice, take a moment to check in with yourself. Notice how you’re feeling, both physically, mentally, and emotionally. After completing each practice, check in again and see how you feel. How you feel might help you identify which nervous system state(s) you may be experiencing before and after each practice.
If you can’t identify your state, try something on! Just the act of paying attention and tending to yourself can be enough of a step towards healing.
The process of regulation is deeply individual; it’s about noticing, practicing, and allowing whatever arises to exist with curiosity, compassion, and care.
You can do these practices when you feel like you are in survival mode and/or when you are in a good place. Sometimes practicing when you are feeling safe and secure can help you to explore and experiment with curiosity rather than out of desperation.
We recommend trying each practice 1-3 times before deciding if it’s working for you–there’s no “right” amount as it will vary person to person.
Not all tools may resonate with you in every moment or ever, and that’s perfectly fine. It’s better to have a variety of tools in your toolbox—some may gather dust, but they’ll be there when you need them. Keep the ones that work, leave the ones that don’t, and modify those that need an adjustment, so that they feel right for you!
Be gentle with yourself.
Ways to Connect & Engage
Everything’s better when shared with a community! We invite you to share this blog and our practices with anyone you think might benefit from them. And even better, join our Instagram community chat!
To join the community chat:
Open Instagram and go to your messages.
In the search bar, enter “Homeostasis for the Holidays” and click “Join.”
Our team will add you to the group, where you can share your comments, thoughts, and experiences, as well as ask us any questions that arise.
Save our practices every Tuesday and Thursday!
Go to @messinamovement on Instagram.
Click on the post you’d like to save.
Tap the flag icon in the bottom right corner (next to "like," "comment," and "share").
For bonus points, create a new collection named “Nervous System SOS” and save each practice to this collection.
To access this collection later, go to your profile page, tap the three horizontal lines in the top right, then select “Saved.” Your new collection will be right at the top.
Enable notifications for our posts
To ensure you don’t miss anything, enable notifications from us by following these steps:
Go to @messinamovement in your Instagram app.
Tap the three dots in the top right corner.
Select “Notifications” and toggle on “Posts,” “Stories,” and “Reels.” (You can always turn notifications off later if you prefer.)
Sign up for our newsletters
In addition to our Instagram posts, we’ll be sending reminders and updates via email. Join our newsletter to stay up-to-date with all the latest practices and news! You can sign up here, or head to the link in our Instagram bio (the first link listed).
Contact us anytime
We’re here to support you, not only throughout December but all year long. If you have any questions or need additional support, feel free to reach out at hello@lisamessina.com or book a complimentary 30-minute session with us.
Gratitude for The Process of Regulation
As you follow along with our series, remember that regulation is a process, and every step you take matters—even if it sometimes feels like you’re moving backwards (you’re not!). Each trigger, barrier, and blockage within you was built with the purpose of keeping you safe. While some of these protections may no longer serve you, they are a testament to your resilience. Now is the time to reconnect with the felt-sense of safety we all deserve, one gentle practice at a time.
We invite you to approach this process with gratitude for your nervous system’s brilliance and adaptability. Stay connected with us for weekly practices, reach out when you need encouragement or have a question, and let this season be a time of returning to your inner home—feeling more centered, present, and equipped to navigate the holidays with resilience and ease.
If you can move through the holiday season feeling supported and tuned in, it sets the tone for the year ahead. Each small act of care you give to yourself strengthens your capacity to meet life’s challenges with presence and grace.
Thank you for inviting The Messina Movement to be part of this sacred season. We are deeply honored by your trust and remain committed to supporting you in all the meaningful and powerful ways we know how.
Looking to learn more about me?
Check out the About Me page if you’re interested!
Looking for more ways to connect and get support with this work?
1:1 Sessions with Me
Join The Process, our online 8-week group program
Practice with our On Demand Library
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